The Best Sex Advice on Youtube
By Camille Haimet
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night in full freakout mode, your mind melting with questions like "what is Herpes? how do I get herpes? I definitely have herpes, right?", only to be lead on a desperate quest through Web MD and delicious pictures curtesy of google images? Or gone to put a condom on a guy and just realized you had absolutely no idea how to do it on a non-banana? Seen a vagina up close and thought, what do I even do with this? Found yourself alienated and ashamed to admit you didn't know there were more than two genders?
It is true that our access to resources in everyday life that answer our sex-related questions are slim at best and barely accessible. Women and Men's interest magazines? Too idiotic and hetero-normative. Sex ed from school or parents? Forget it! Porn? Sure, cause sex is exactly like porn...
But with the emergence of a new wave a Youtube sex-positive vloggers in the last 5 years approximately, the game is changing ever so slightly. These brave, commendable individuals are answering your deepest, darkest (or silliest) questions about the beast with two backs in light, humorous, yet educational ways that are all-inclusive and accessible for everyone.
From sensual female body positivity, through sex-toy reviews and questions about gender identity, there is something out there on the Youtube for almost everyone.
Compiled below, you will find a list of some of the most relevant and amazing Youtube sexperts in the game right now. Hover over and click the youtubers name to get to their channel for further research..
1-All Hail- Laci Green
Videos on Youtube: 169
Yes, I know you know, but what kind of "Best Sex Advice on Youtube" would this be without including the queen herself? Laci Green was arguably one of the first big names in the sex-positive vloggers scene, starting her educational videos on the subject all the way back in 2008! Her Youtube channel goes beyond the conventional "sex tips" (though vids like "How to put on a condom???" cover those as well) and attempts to provide answers (or at least open discussion) to all types of feminism, sexuality, and gender-identity issues. Her videos come with very clear, concise titles so you know exactly what you're getting ("BDSM 101", "Masturbation!"), most of the time written in exactly the format of your own personal question ("Wait! Is Makeup Sexist?", "How Many Freaking Genders"), and explained in a similarly accessible, no-bullshit, matter-of-fact manner. And she knows what she's talking about- in fact she has been an activist and advocate for sexual education since college, is certified in domestic violence and rape crisis counseling, and produces a sex ed series with MTV and Planned Parenthood. All in all, she's the ultimate online resource for the sexually curious feminist.
2-Gay Guru- "wickydkewl" with Davey Wavey
Videos on Youtube: 626
With his oldest video on Youtube dating back 10 years, and over 1 million followers, it's safe to say that Davey Wavey has also been in the sex vlogging game for a while. In the same vein as Laci Green, Davey began his career as a gay rights social justice warrior in college, attempting to form a GSA at his overly religious school and later, working for an LGBT non-profit. Though his Youtube presence started as a gay lifestyle channel, following him in his daily life, it has developed into a much broader sex education space celebrating men's sexuality and "anything related to dick". What is wicked cool about "wickydkewl", as the channel is called, is the sense of experimentation which pervades the videos. Most of the time, Davey is trying something new on camera for the benefit of everyone's else empirical knowledge ("Are French Guys Better Lovers", "What's Up My Butt Challenge", "My First Time In A Sling") while still managing to keep the content informative yet fun and light ("How To Give Brojobs.") Even cooler, though the Channel focuses mostly on gay interests, it is very inclusive and also provides a lot of content people of various genders and sexual identities might enjoy ("Never Say THIS To A Trans Person...", "Straight Guys React To Dick Pics!"). As a matter of fact, his main audience is apparently made up of teenage girls. Go figure.
3-All Things Lady Love- "Stevie" with Stevie Boebi
Videos on Youtube: 104
On the Gay women side of the spectrum, we have Stevie Boebi. Though many Youtubers on this list infuse their videos with buttloads of comedy and positive vibes, there's just something about Stevie's particular brand of self-depricating humor, bubbliness, and goofy smile that makes you fall instantly in love with her; for example her counting how many times she can say "buttstuff" throughout one of her most recent videos, ping noises included, or her video entitled "Pokemon Sex Moves". Her channel is a great resource for any lady who loves ladies ("HOW TO GET KINKY") , wants to experiment with ladies for the first time ("How To Eat Pussy THE RIGHT WAY"), or even just for ladies who want to know WTF is up with their weird freaky bodies ("Why does my vagina smell?"). She even gives out a decent amount of relationship and love advice ("I'M INLOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND!!!"), a precious resource for young women faced with the challenge of constantly running into mostly hetero-normative advice of this kind. A precious resource for anyone really.
4-Guide to LGBT- Arielle Scarcella
Videos on Youtube: 283
Arielle Scarcella, "a lesbian who loves LGBT culture" is another vlogger who gives the spotlight to LGBT love, with a slight focus on lesbian issues and lifestyle. Although she makes sure to begin her channel's description with "calling all gays and straights alike". There is a similar spirit of experimentation and fun in her videos as with Davey Wavey's first time challenges. Videos such as "Smelling My Own Vagina" and "Gay Guy Shows Lesbian his Penis" are a hilarious way of calling attention to how inherently strange and complicated sexuality can be, pointing it out but then immediately saying " "and that's ok". Her channel takes on the immense challenge of explaining all types of confusing elements on the spectrum of gender and sexual identity ("Bisexual Guys Explain: Men vs Women", "Straight Girl vs Lesbian Orgasm", "How This Transgender Woman Has Sex"). Her videos cover as wide a range of topics as you could imagine and are a great place to go with any LGBT related questions you might have. The fact that Arielle very often puts idividuals with very different preferences or identities in the same videos and opens a discussion between them where they are free to compare and contrast, is something that makes her channel exceptional and unlike almost anything out there. In my opinion Arielle Scarcella's channel is perhaps the most inclusive one on this list.
5-Girly Encyclopedia- Hannah Witton
Videos on Youtube: 353
Across the pond, the big (huge) name in female sex and body positivity is clearly Hannah Witton. Watching her Youtube channel is like reading "What's Happening to My Body", but shit-faced with your best friends. Though she has been criticized by members of the LGBT community for being too hetero-normative (the majority of her content does seem to be targeted at cis-women), recurring video series like the "Hormone Diaries", the sex toy and masturbation hacks or her #bangingbookclub seem like important resources for a younger sexually-active female audience to learn about sex and their bodies in an accessible way. Indeed, Witton is hilarious and always posting fun interactive content on her channel ("Truth or Drink with My Ex", "Bathtub Busking"). She has another recurring segment entitled "Drunk Advice" where she invites fellow youtubers and provides answers to questions fans have tweeted at her. She always makes sure to remind viewers that they should absolutely not take her advice, which keeps it all in good fun. Hannah Witton is also an excellent starting place for Youtube sex advice because of these constant collaborations with other vloggers. In fact, most people mentioned on this list are featured on her channel at some point.
6-Dr. Love- "Sexplanations" with Lindsey Doe
Videos on Youtube: 249
Dr. Lindsey Doe is a clinical sexologist, so you known she's legit and will never steer you wrong. In her everyday (read: non-Youtube) life, she is actually also a university professor and runs a sexual health center. As you can see, she is fully committed to the cause! She began her Youtube "sexedutainment" career in 2013 after VLogbrothers' Hank Green approached her about starting her own sex advice channel when she invited him to speak in one of her classes. Her channel covers a very wide range of sex-related topics and answers questions in a medically-accurate way that is also fun to watch. She has one especially interesting recurring segment called "Ask Lindsey" where she answers questions from her viewers. The responses are so carefully thought out and honest that they are worth a watch for anyone curious about elements of sexuality they didn't even know they were curious about. The videos are carefully labeled in the same concise white bold letters with carefully announced subject matter: "The Ultimate Blowjob", "How To Use A Tampon", "Are You A Douchebag?", "Anal Sex". In fact, with her experience, goofy and positive personality, candidness, wide variety of topics, and completely non-judgmental attitude, I would gladly vouch for her as the ideal sex education teacher. If her videos were required viewing in the High School Curriculum, we'd probably all be a lot better off.
7-The Sex Mogul- Shan Boody
Videos on Youtube: 175
Sexologist Shannon "Shan Boody" Boodram really does it all. Between her sex-positive Youtube channel, one-on-one Skype counseling, touring and lecturing, releasing her own vibrator and best-selling book (Laid), and hosting shows for MTV and Freeform Network, she has justly earned her reputation as the "Sex Girl". She has now been featured in a variety of media, from CNN to Time Magazine and (fun fact!) once made headlines for wearing a skirt made of her-pleasure condoms to the VMAs red carpet and is now a true celebrity of the sex ed world, as niche as that sounds. She regularly discusses her longterm open relationship with her boyfriend and encourages people to see love and sex as whatever works for them on an individual level. Though a lot of her content is pretty basic sex-ed (important nonetheless!) and does not delve too far or frequently into issues of sexual identity and gender, she does pay particular attention to the art of being sexy ("How To Buy Sexy"), even occasionally offering hot dance classes on the channel. She also frequently discusses STD's, a topic that remains taboo even in the world of positive sex vlogging. She discusses relationships extensively and watching her videos often makes for a truly sensual experience.
8-Mastering Sex Positions- "Glamerotica" with Sexpert Tyomi
Videos on Youtube: 155
Now before anyone starts freaking out: yes, Sexpert Tyomi's channel "Glamerotica" focuses almost exclusively on sex between a man and a woman. And yes, there is a certain grainy, home-porn seediness to her videos. Now that we're over that, what Glamerotica does achieve is an in-detail demonstration of how to master various sex positions and acts. For instance, never had I seen someone explain "How To Ride Your Man" so carefully and graphically before. Even after researching this article for days and seeing all types of videos, this was the first that made me check and see that nobody was watching my screen; but you know what? Now I can ride with the best of 'em and I didn't even know I was doing it wrong! Tyomi goes so far as to provide exercise videos to strengthen thighs, proverbially teaching a woman to fish instead of just handing her one. Furthermore, Tyomi stands out amongst other Youtube vloggers as a resource for plus-size women of color (though not at all exclusively) doling out advice sometimes specifically targeted at "you ladies with bigger thighs" or women of Hispanic, Caribbean, or African descent. Sadly, this kind of advice is few and far between and hard to come by even with all the resources out there today. Which makes the beautiful, sexy Tyomi invaluable to hetero women wanting to master their sexuality.
9-Sensual Goddess- Layla Martin
Videos on Youtube: 139
Similarly to Sexpert Tyomi (above), you could choose to criticize Layla Martin for focusing on hetero-cys-females, but she explores the subject with such overwhelming positivity and sensuality that it has lead Marie Claire Magazine to nickname her the "Headmistress of Pleasure". In contrast to many sexuality vloggers on this list, Layla Martin pretty much foregoes the basic sex ed or sexplaining present on many other channels and focuses instead on a wellness-oriented, meditational practice of self-love, teaching women how to see themselves as goddesses and to be treated as such. Her tips for achieving pleasure in all its forms, from kissing to oral sex and tasting good down there, go above and beyond and are truly focused on female pleasure. Though I'd like to take this time to point out that she also gives wonderful advice for couples and male pleasure (that means you, "Bottlepop Technique" ;) .) She also puts out a lot of empowering #iamnotashamed videos focusing on personal stories ("My STD Story", "Revealing My Sexual Abuse Experience") that help show women that these kinds of shitty experiences happen to everyone, and while they are not ok, they aren't anything to be embarassed about. Bring all this together and throw in Layla's gentle, sensual and positive aura, and you get a truly delicious experience on your way to "experiencing epic sex and legendary love".
10-Intersectional Feminist- Riley J. Dennis
Videos on Youtube: 112
As a "polyamorous, atheist, lesbian, nonbinary trans woman with a passion for fiction writing, intersectional feminism and making videos" Riley J Dennis is definitely what you could call a unique presence on Youtube. What her channel lacks in basic sex tips and tricks (though there are a few: "Setting up a sex swing & inflatable dildo thing") it fully makes up for in it's frank and all-encompassing discussions about gender issues ("Trans Lesbian Paradox"), "everyday feminism" and sexual-political activism ("Planned Parenthood and the ACA"). The videos are an excellent resource for anyone wanting to learn more about issues of gender and sexuality from someone who is living firsthand with a complicated identity and using it to teach others. In fact, Riley J. Dennis' channel is unique in that there are actually other Youtube channels dedicated to bashing it and harassing Dennis. Though this is upsetting, it also means that she must be arriving at some sort of important truth that usually isn't spoken about.
Those are just a few to get you started, but there are many MANY more wonderful sex-positive vloggers out there for you to discover. Remember to stay curious and spread the word, so that we can all better understand our own sexuality and that of other people around us; and increase our sex-positivity!